!!!!

I HATE YOU, THEN I MISS YOU. 

THEN I HATE YOU AGAIN.... THEN I MISS YOU AGAIN.

and the cycle go on and on and on...

I really don't know what am I doing. Why am I going on about this again? I thought it was over, but it is just another unstable cover. I really hate this. I wish I could just leave everything behind and run away. But reality will always be around. Sooner or later, I will have to face it and whatever the consequences are, I have to go through it too, be it alone or with someone. I'm surprised with myself. Am I that weak? I really wanna get out of school, out of Singapore, to somewhere of a new environment. My family, my friends, I really don't wanna leave them. But I'm really tired of this shit that is going on. Argh.

"If people leave your life once, there might be a second and third time."

This has been stuck in my mind. Just once, and I'm like feeling shit. Twice, thrice? Kill me. I cannot blame him too. I still think it's all because of me. 

I wish the day, when I wake up to find that I no longer care, miss and love him anymore, will come faster.