At the verge.

Last night I felt so burdened with everything. 2 major problems – Friendship and Feelings, struck me and I felt really lost and empty. Thank goodness, Cole was there for me. She stayed up even though she worked for 12 hours yesterday, just to listen to me rant and complain about life. In fact, after cheering me up I actually fell asleep on her! She’s definitely going to be my life-long friend.

I actually thought a lot last night and think back to those days. I’m not stress or what, just tired from trying. Both my problems are similar and that’s what killing me! I’m just tired of always taking the first step to keep our friendship alive when you’re actually not helping by keeping it alive together with me. And you did was to ignore me after a few replies? Really, I’m so tired of trying that I’m giving up. I don’t want to try keeping this going when it’s just one-sided. If you aren’t going to try to keep this going, then it’ll be the end. Really the end.

I really feel like throwing away all my feelings and just not give a shit to anything. Nothing just seems to be going the way I want it to. I hate how people are giving me hope and when it reaches the climax, they just go and leave me all alone. Stop fooling around, will you… I’m really not going to do anything about these 2 main problems and just let it be. Whatever the result, it’s fate.