Horrible Monday.

Tell me how bad can today go.....

SIGH.

At fucking 2am in the morning, someone have to wake me up after I finally went to sleep, just to scold me for something I did right... Then the rain have to come and caused a damn horrible traffic jam, which caused me to be late for school. Just what a perfect way to start my day isn't it? And plus the Monday Blues wasn't helping AT ALL. I guess I was frowning and sulking all the way to school.

I realised.... Whenever I'm left all alone, that's when the dark side of me comes out and all the bad thoughts start haunting me. I hate that side of me. It's a side of me that I don't wanna fucking come across with. But why.... Why am I coming across that side of me so often these days..... I feel like as though I've drifted from everyone. From people who I used to confide all my problems with. I feel like I'm a burden.



Can't I, for once, fall for someone who will love me back? I hate the idea of loving someone, only to find out that he/she has no same feelings for you and you're just like fml. Why am I so gullible. Why do I take in every convo so serious, only to make a big fool out of myself..



I really need to rant it out. But NOBODY have the time for me. Or I would say, in everybody's eyes, I'm just the happy easygoing girl. But deep inside me, nobody saw the tired, upset, angry me. And idk, that's why I'm here, ranting to someone/thing (if only you're real....)



Now I feel so empty, so out of place.. Where do I belong?

Everybody are so busy with their studies, their friends, their family. Idw to be the cause of damping one's mood. This feeling just cannot be described. It's like, you're bursting inside, you're crying inside, just waiting for a hug, a pair of listening ears, but all you see around you, are occupied friends. Idk luh....



Drowning myself with work for this few weeks. I know I'm not able to get over it soon.... Hopefully by keeping myself occupied, I'll be happier. Temporary but better than nothing. School, exams, work. 









I'll be fine.

It's just me and my thoughts, no worries.

I'll be back smiling, laughing, perfectly fine tomorrow morning.

Just give me a night to get over the fact that you and me, are impossible.

It's just my wishful thinking all this while......